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202 lines
9.9 KiB
202 lines
9.9 KiB
export const ENEMIES = { |
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old_man_judo: { |
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id: "old_man_judo", name: "Old Man Judo", maxHp: 40, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/13.png", // Young person with cap |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/terrace.png", |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 3 === 0 ? { type: "block", value: 6 } : { type: "attack", value: turn % 2 === 0 ? 7 : 8 } |
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}, |
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beastco: { |
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id: "beastco", name: "Beastco", maxHp: 35, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/2.png", // Dizzy/confused character |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/throne room.png", |
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ai: (turn) => ({ type: "attack", value: 4 }), |
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}, |
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codegirl: { |
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id: "codegirl", name: "Codegirl", maxHp: 50, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/codegirl.png", // Warrior with conflicted expression |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/terrace.png", // Repeat background |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 4 === 0 ? { type: "heal", value: 8 } : { type: "attack", value: 8 }, |
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onHeal: (ctx) => { |
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ctx.enemy.hp = Math.min(ctx.enemy.maxHp, ctx.enemy.hp + 8); |
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ctx.log("Codegirl resolves the merge conflict and heals 8 HP!"); |
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} |
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}, |
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lowkeyabu: { |
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id: "lowkeyabu", name: "LowKeyAbu", maxHp: 85, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/7.png", // Powerful demon/witch |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/castle.png", // Repeat background |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 3 === 1 ? { type: "debuff", value: 1 } : { type: "attack", value: 10 }, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 1) |
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}, |
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nightshadedude: { |
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id: "nightshadedude", name: "Nightshadedude", maxHp: 120, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/11.png", // Powerful demon/witch |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/dead forest.png", // Repeat background |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 3 === 1 ? { type: "debuff", value: 1 } : { type: "attack", value: 14 }, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 1) |
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}, |
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defyusall: { |
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id: "defyusall", name: "Defyusall", maxHp: 65, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/15.png", // Elusive character |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/castle.png", |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 3 === 0 ? { type: "block", value: 8 } : { type: "attack", value: 10 }, |
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}, |
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lithium: { |
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id: "lithium", name: "Lithium", maxHp: 55, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/19.png", // Scholar/mage with glasses |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/dead forest.png", |
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ai: (turn) => (turn % 2 === 0) ? { type: "debuff", value: 1 } : { type: "attack", value: 12 }, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 1) |
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}, |
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teej: { |
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id: "teej", name: "Teej", maxHp: 120, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/boss_birthday_bug.png", // Demanding/angry character |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/throne room.png", // Repeat background - fitting for boss |
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ai: (turn) => { |
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const cyc = turn % 4; |
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if (cyc === 1) return { type: "debuff", value: 1 }; // Weak player |
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if (cyc === 2) return { type: "attack", value: 18 }; // Big hit |
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if (cyc === 3) return { type: "block", value: 0 }; // Crash → heal |
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return { type: "attack", value: 22 }; // Burst |
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}, |
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onBlock: (ctx) => { ctx.enemy.hp = Math.min(ctx.enemy.maxHp, ctx.enemy.hp + 8); ctx.log("Teej crashes and reboots, healing 8 HP!"); } |
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}, |
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// ACT 2 ENEMIES - Harder versions |
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teej: { |
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id: "teej", name: "Teej", maxHp: 65, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/teej.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/castle.png", |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 3 === 0 ? { type: "debuff", value: 2 } : { type: "attack", value: turn % 2 === 0 ? 12 : 14 }, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 2) |
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}, |
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begin: { |
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id: "begin", name: "Begin", maxHp: 80, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/begin.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/dead forest.png", |
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ai: (turn) => (turn % 2 === 0) ? { type: "attack", value: 16 } : { type: "block", value: 12 } |
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}, |
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adam: { |
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id: "adam", name: "Adam Elmore", maxHp: 70, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/adam.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/terrace.png", |
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ai: (turn) => turn % 4 === 0 ? { type: "debuff", value: 1 } : { type: "attack", value: 13 }, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => { |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 1); |
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const debuffLines = [ |
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"Adam: 'Okay, so here's the thing - your architecture is gonna cost you a fortune.'", |
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"Adam: 'Let me show you why serverless is the way to go here...'", |
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"Adam: 'This is exactly why you need to think about cold starts.'", |
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"Adam: 'I'm gonna walk you through why this approach won't scale.'" |
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]; |
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ctx.log(debuffLines[Math.floor(Math.random() * debuffLines.length)]); |
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} |
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}, |
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david: { |
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id: "david", name: "David", maxHp: 90, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/david.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/castle.png", |
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ai: (turn) => { |
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const cyc = turn % 3; |
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if (cyc === 0) return { type: "attack", value: 11 }; |
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if (cyc === 1) return { type: "attack", value: 11 }; |
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return { type: "debuff", value: 1 }; |
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}, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => { ctx.flags.nextTurnEnergyPenalty = (ctx.flags.nextTurnEnergyPenalty || 0) + 1; ctx.log("David schedules another meeting! Lose 1 energy next turn."); } |
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}, |
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dax: { |
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id: "dax", name: "Dax", maxHp: 150, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/dax.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/throne room.png", |
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ai: (turn) => { |
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const cyc = turn % 5; |
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if (cyc === 1) return { type: "debuff", value: 2 }; |
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if (cyc === 2) return { type: "attack", value: 25 }; |
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if (cyc === 3) return { type: "block", value: 15 }; |
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if (cyc === 4) return { type: "attack", value: 30 }; |
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return { type: "attack", value: 20 }; |
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}, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => { |
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ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 1); |
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const debuffLines = [ |
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"Dax: 'This is actually insane. Like, why would you even do this?'", |
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"Dax: 'Bro, this code is literally unhinged. I'm rewriting everything.'", |
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"Dax: 'I'm not even joking, this is the worst thing I've ever seen.'", |
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"Dax: 'This is so cursed. I can't even look at this anymore.'" |
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]; |
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ctx.log(debuffLines[Math.floor(Math.random() * debuffLines.length)]); |
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}, |
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onBlock: (ctx) => { |
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ctx.enemy.hp = Math.min(ctx.enemy.maxHp, ctx.enemy.hp + 12); |
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const healLines = [ |
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"Dax: 'Actually, let me just rebuild this from scratch in 5 minutes.'", |
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"Dax: 'Hold on, I'm gonna ship a fix real quick.' *heals 12 HP*", |
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"Dax: 'This is actually trivial to fix. Watch this.' *optimizes everything*", |
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"Dax: 'I literally just rewrote your entire stack while you weren't looking.'" |
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]; |
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ctx.log(healLines[Math.floor(Math.random() * healLines.length)]); |
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} |
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}, |
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taylor: { |
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id: "taylor", name: "Taylor Otwell", maxHp: 200, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/taylor.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/throne room.png", |
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ai: (turn) => { |
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const cyc = turn % 6; |
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if (cyc === 0) return { type: "attack", value: 22 }; // Eloquent attack |
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if (cyc === 1) return { type: "debuff", value: 2 }; // Artisan command |
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if (cyc === 2) return { type: "attack", value: 28 }; // Forge deployment |
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if (cyc === 3) return { type: "block", value: 25 }; // Laravel shield |
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if (cyc === 4) return { type: "debuff", value: 3 }; // Composer update |
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return { type: "attack", value: 35 }; // Nova dashboard strike |
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}, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => { |
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if (ctx.enemy.hp < ctx.enemy.maxHp / 2) { |
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ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 3); |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.log("Taylor unleashes a devastating Laravel package!"); |
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} else { |
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ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.log("Taylor rewrites your code with elegant Laravel solutions!"); |
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} |
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}, |
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onBlock: (ctx) => { |
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const heal = 20; |
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ctx.enemy.hp = Math.min(ctx.enemy.maxHp, ctx.enemy.hp + heal); |
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ctx.log("Taylor optimizes with Laravel Octane, healing " + heal + " HP!"); |
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} |
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}, |
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dhh: { |
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id: "dhh", name: "DHH", maxHp: 300, |
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avatar: "assets/avatars/dhh.jpg", |
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background: "assets/backgrounds/throne room.png", |
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ai: (turn) => { |
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const cyc = turn % 6; |
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if (cyc === 0) return { type: "attack", value: 15 }; // Baseline attack |
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if (cyc === 1) return { type: "debuff", value: 2 }; // Debuff turn |
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if (cyc === 2) return { type: "attack", value: 20 }; // Heavy hitting attack |
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if (cyc === 3) return { type: "block", value: 20 }; // Defense + heal |
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if (cyc === 4) return { type: "debuff", value: 1 }; // Follow-up debuff |
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return { type: "attack", value: 30 }; // Another strong attack |
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}, |
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onDebuff: (ctx) => { |
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if (ctx.enemy.hp < ctx.enemy.maxHp / 2) { |
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ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 3); |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.log("DHH unleashes a Twitter rant about your code quality!"); |
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} else { |
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ctx.applyWeak(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.applyVulnerable(ctx.player, 2); |
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ctx.log("DHH criticizes your architecture decisions!"); |
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} |
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}, |
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onBlock: (ctx) => { |
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const heal = ctx.enemy.hp < ctx.enemy.maxHp / 3 ? 20 : 15; |
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ctx.enemy.hp = Math.min(ctx.enemy.maxHp, ctx.enemy.hp + heal); |
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ctx.log(`DHH refactors the codebase with Ruby on Rails, healing ${heal} HP!`); |
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} |
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} |
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};
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